If you grew up with angry parents, one or both, you tend to have a certain reaction to anger than you do with other emotions. This reaction may be fear, anger, submission, dissociation, or something else. For me, it was fear. Currently still is at times, but I’m healing from it. 🤍

When I’m in the presence of anger, I notice pangs of fear in my body, especially my solar plexus and heart chakra. Fear is typically followed by feelings of inadequacy and doubt. After some shadow work, I’ve realized it stems from my childhood, where anger was a regular occurrence in my household and when it happened, I would feel afraid and become silent.

I use anger as an example because that’s what resonates with me, but if you have a certain emotion that causes a trigger within you, try to do some shadow work and dig into why. Why am I feeling [insert emotion] in the presence of [insert emotion]? What is the earliest memory I have of feeling [insert emotion] in the presence of [insert emotion]? What happened?

I want to share something that’s helped me dig into my emotions better:

Your feelings aren’t random, they are messengers. If you want to get anywhere, you need to be able to let them speak to you and tell you what you really need. — Brianna Wiest

From there, you start to become aware of when the triggers will come, instead of them blindsiding you. This awareness transcends to you being able to control the trigger itself by letting it go. Which then gives you the ability to balance all your emotions easily.

Anger is a normal emotion we all feel from time to time. As is every other emotion, so they deserve to be felt properly and expressed healthily. If certain emotions weren’t expressed healthily in your environment, know it was not your fault, nor was it your responsibility to know how to handle it. Affirmations are a great way to heal your childhood wound around these triggers. Some affirmations you can explore:

I am enough.

I let go all of my pain and suffering around [insert emotion].

I know this [insert emotion] is not me, or this person, and will pass.

I let go of what I can’t control, and focus on what I can.

I am safe in the presence of [insert emotion].